Spiritually Stunted Babies-Part 4

Over the last few weeks I've been looking at how spiritually stunted babies are like real, physical babies. This whole idea came out of observing my two little girls & how our physical & emotional immaturity is so often paralleled in our spiritual maturity. So here's the last parallel that I want us to look at. When we act like spiritual babies or when we're spiritually stunted...

We Still Need Someone To Clean Up Our Mess.

Believe me I could have used much more descriptive terminology because I'm thinking about a particular mess. Parents might not want to admit it, but the truth is that one of the greatest days in parenthood is not the day your child takes his first steps or speaks her first words; it's the day when your child finally learns how to use the potty all by herself! It's a great day when a parent doesn't have to deal with poopy diapers & all that goes with it, but imagine what it would be like if your child never hit that milestone. It wouldn't merely be gross; it would be tragic. They would forever be dependent on someone else to take care of a basic need.

Spiritually stunted babies are just as tragic. They constantly are running to someone else to clean up the mess in their life. Sure, every now & then we all need the help of others, but we all know people who are constantly having crises that they can't deal with on their own, & they need their pastors or some other spiritual leader to "fix" their mess. 

What's really tragic is that too often these spiritually stunted babies never realize what they're doing to themselves & those around them. They're either oblivious to it, or they become defiant & defensive. It's never their fault. It's always what someone else has done to them that's created the continuous drama in their lives. As a result, it becomes harder & harder to really help someone grow. Instead, family, friends, & leaders are pulled into a constant drama of hurt, blame, & unwillingness to really deal with the issues that always rear their ugly head. Until we acknowledge the reality of our immaturity, we can't grow & become stronger, more mature believers.

Spiritually Stunted Babies-Part 3

Sadly, churches are filled with spiritually stunted babies who cling to their routines & who throw fits when someone dares to challenge the statues quo. Why are these people stunted in their growth? Here's a possible answer:

We Still Can't Feed Ourselves.

It's funny to watch a little kid try to feed themselves. They get as much food on them as in them. It's cute when they're learning how to manipulate a fork or spoon to get the food to their mouth, but it's not so cute when all of this happens & a few minutes after the meal, the child is complaining because he or she is hungry. For most kids there is a stage where they should be able to feed themselves, & if they can't, something is wrong.

Spiritual babies are not that different. They either don't know how or refuse to feed themselves spiritually. Often they assume that it's someone else's job to feed them. Their Bibles become props used to decorate their homes or as an accessory each Sunday at church. In some cases, their Bible doesn't even get that much attention. Having served in ministry in one way or another for 20 years, I'm still shocked at how often I see people, especially men, come to worship or Bible study without a Bible. I mean surely you think you're going to need & use your Bible at church, right? 

As a result, they get just enough of God's Word into their lives to make a mess. They often talk about the Bible, but they don't really know Scripture or use it as the filter for their worldview. That's why it's not uncommon for spiritually stunted babies to be self-righteous hypocrites who hold people to standards of "holiness" that aren't even biblical. Each Sunday they climb into their high-chairs, known as a pew, & demand to be fed by the pastor or their small group leader. If you want a picture of a spiritually stunted baby, go check out the Pharisees in the Gospels. They embody the idea of spiritually stunted. 

Believers who can't feed themselves will not be healthy believers, & it will affect the rest of the family (church.)

Book Review: The 4 Wills Of God

I recently received a copy of "The 4 Wills Of God" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs from B&H Publishing to look over & give my review. Dr. Eggerichs is both a pastor & a conference speaker. He & his wife, Sarah, have developed the Love & Respect Conference focusing on teaching men & women how to pursue God-honoring, loving, healthy biblical relationships. Much of the insight that is shared in this book is built on the 30+ years of pastoring & counseling.

The basic premise of this book is that so often we want to know God's unique will for our lives without examining whether we're being faithful to God's universal will for us. Dr. Eggerichs rightly asserts that as we pursue faithfulness to the 4 universal wills, God's unique will become easier to discern in particular situations.

So what are the "4 Wills Of God" & where does Dr. Eggerichs find them?

1. Believe In Jesus Christ (John 6:40)
2. Give Thanks In Everything (1st Thessalonians 5:18)
3. Submit In Doing Right (1st Peter 2:13-15)
4. Abstain From Sexual Sin (1st Thessalonians 4:3)

These passages literally say something like, "This is God's will..." Therefore, there is some solid biblical foundation here that Eggerichs can build upon. He devotes a couple of chapters for each of the "4 Wills" using one chapter to lay the biblical foundation & another to flesh out practical application & tell stories to illustrate those points. For me, there were a few too many stories, but that's just me. Other readers will likely love the numerous stories that help illustrate the author's point. 

This could be a really good resource for counseling, small groups, or for individual growth as long as those using it don't reduce the "4 Wills" to some legalistic grid for morality & instead realize they are more of a road map to living the life that God desires for us of growth in Him & impact in our relationships.

Spiritually Stunted Babies-Part 2

All of us hit the pause button from time to time in our spiritual growth, but sometimes something happens and our growth gets completely stunted. It's as if we're spiritual 2 year olds, & we definitely know how to show it. Here's the second way to spot the spiritually stunted babies:

We Still Throw Fits.

Last week I talked about the fact that little kids love routine & when that routine gets messed up, the kid usually flips. That of course leads to the fit. We've all seen them. The kid momentarily loses their mind as well as control of their body. They jump up & down or roll around uncontrollably; there's usually crying or screaming involved. It's fun, big fun, but usually if the parent can wait it out, it's over relatively quickly.

The same is true of a spiritual baby. Babies, both spiritual & physical, are still primarily focused on themselves, & both spiritual & physical babies cry & throw fits when they have a need they think is going unmet. Here's the thing: not all fits are the result of purely selfish desires. A lot of times the needs are real, but the way a person goes about expressing the need is what is selfish. That's where it takes real leadership to determine whether you're dealing with a selfish person or someone who has some growing to do & is just ACTING selfish. Those are the fits you can walk with someone through & help them grow. It's when you deal with someone who seems to be a chronic fit-thrower that you need to be really concerned. That's a sign of stunted growth, & there is more going on than the particular issue they're throwing a fit about this time.

So the next time that person throws a fit because you messed with their routine, you have to figure out whether they're being selfish at the time or if they are just plain selfish. A lot of times a little kid needs you to stop & explain things further to calm them down. Then they're good. Remember that simple practice next time somebody throws a fit.

Spiritually Stunted Babies

All Christians go through seasons where we aren't growing. It may be due to our laziness or some other sin that drags us off the path of Christ, but no matter what the cause, we've all been there. Those who deny that are lying to themselves! However, I've also noticed that our churches are filled with a lot of people who don't look like it, but they are spiritual babies. They've been Christians for a long time, but somewhere along the way their growth was stunted. They may know the language & the church culture, but in reality they're reliving the same year(s) of their faith over & over again. 

Over the next few weeks I'm going to give you handful of ways you can spot the spiritually stunted babies around you or maybe that stunted baby is the person looking back in the mirror (that's how it is for me sometimes). Here's the first way that we (church people) act like spiritually stunted babies:

We Need Our Routine.

Babies like routines. Babies need routines in order to function at their best. Try messing with a two year old's routine & see what happens (we'll talk more about that tomorrow)! But here's something I've noticed: Little kids get into routines & they expect their parents to keep them up even if the child doesn't really participate. For example, when my younger daughter was little, she learned a little prayer song & insisted that we sing it at meals & at bedtime. At first, she would sing along enthusiastically, but after a little while she didn't participate at all. But guess what? If we tried to skip the song, which was getting kind of old to her mother & me, she freaks. She has to have it done that way.

In the same way, our churches have been built on routine, & there is nothing inherently wrong with that. Routine is important, but why should a routine stay in place when it is no longer useful? But that's exactly what happens in many ministries. The routine & the status quo are guarded, even at the expense of the ministry. Routine becomes a problem when it exists for its own sake. Just as a child eventually grows out of the afternoon nap routine, there will be structures & routines in your church that you will & should outgrow.

Watch out when you start messing with the routine. Those who NEED it will freak.

Book Review: Becoming A Welcoming Church

I recently received a copy of Thom Rainer's new book: "Becoming A Welcoming Church". Dr. Rainer is the the President & CEO of Lifeway Christian Resources. In recent years, he has a produced a series of short but powerful books focusing on specific issues of church membership, church decline, & church leadership. In this new book, Rainer focuses on years of research in the area of church guest experience & follow up with those guests. In just 100 pages, he is able to identify some specific issues in how congregations minister to their guests & how to move toward a more effective ministry to newcomers in our churches.

One overarching principle in this book that most churches & church members need to come to grips with is the fact that our churches are not as friendly & welcoming as we think we are. The research shows that guests perceive our churches as friendly...if you already are a part of that church. In short, church members are welcoming to one another, but when it comes to guests, we're not as warm & friendly as we think we are.

This general lack of self-awareness should move church members & leaders to reexamine this aspect of our congregations' ministry to insure that we are as effective in our ministry as possible when it comes to welcoming & caring for the guests who worship in our church this weekend. In order to equip congregations to look in the mirror, Rainer gives not only some ideas but also resources in his book to help our churches see themselves with fresh eyes. Those resources are available in the book & on Dr. Rainer's website. Church leaders would be wise to take advantage of them.

The meat of the book tackles the particular issues of websites, signage, security, cleanliness, & greeters. Rainer gives helpful insight into how to leverage these items in a way that connects with our guests & encourages an atmosphere of authentic, gospel hospitality. One issue that I found somewhat surprising is that research shows that guests feel the most uncomfortable in the minutes prior to the worship service begins. In many places they've been warmly greeted as they arrived, but then they find a seat & are practically ignored until someone stands up & tells everyone to greet each other. Then they're "warmly" greeted again. The problem is that it all comes off as artificial. It's not enough to have a good welcome team. The whole congregation has to see themselves as the welcome team.

The book closes with a great reminder that if we want to be welcoming churches we must be going churches. Our hospitality ministry should really function as an extension of our Great Commission ministry. We reach out to people in our everyday lives. We share the Gospel with them. We share how Christ has changed our lives. We invite them to join us for worship on Sunday. Then the hospitality ministry at our church takes on a greater urgency. It's not just about making sure people get a bulletin. It's about making sure that each person that is a guest in our church feels just as welcomed as they would in our homes or by our Savior.

I would encourage every church leader to pick up copies of this for the church staff, those who serve in their church's hospitality/greeting ministry, & for the congregation in general. The insights & principles in this book need to permeate the cultures of our local congregations so that we not only becoming more welcoming churches, but that we also become more faithful going churches.

Book Review: Sing!

I recently had the opportunity to get a review copy of Keith & Kristyn Getty's "Sing: How Worship Transforms Your Life, Family, & Church" from B&H Publishing. In just a few short pages the Getty's remind us of the transforming power of worship, especially through singing. At the heart of the book is the premise that the Gospel of Jesus compels us to worship, to sing. The Getty's go on to lay out the biblical foundations for worship through singing. Not only does the Gospel message compel us to sing because of the work of Christ in us, but the word of God also commands us to sing. So God does command us to sing & give Him the glory He deserves, but then He graciously provides all the motivation we need in order to respond to Him in worship by working out our salvation through Jesus.

In the chapters that follow the Gettys build upon the biblical foundation to then illustrate how worship impacts our own hearts, our families, & our congregations. Worship fuels our faith relationship with God. We pass that love for God on to our children & grandchildren through the songs of God's holiness, goodness, & grace. They also point out that our congregations' singing need to be fueled by a fresh vision of Jesus & His Gospel. Then as we respond with songs of joy & worship, we'll encourage one another, but we'll also serve as witnesses to the world that we're called to share this Good News with.

Overall, this is a great, short read. I would recommend it not just to church leaders but to any believer who feels like they're stuck in their faith. If you're having trouble finding your song on Sunday or if you want to be equipped to pass on the story of God's love to your kids, pick this book up.