Spiritually Stunted Babies-Part 4

Over the last few weeks I've been looking at how spiritually stunted babies are like real, physical babies. This whole idea came out of observing my two little girls & how our physical & emotional immaturity is so often paralleled in our spiritual maturity. So here's the last parallel that I want us to look at. When we act like spiritual babies or when we're spiritually stunted...

We Still Need Someone To Clean Up Our Mess.

Believe me I could have used much more descriptive terminology because I'm thinking about a particular mess. Parents might not want to admit it, but the truth is that one of the greatest days in parenthood is not the day your child takes his first steps or speaks her first words; it's the day when your child finally learns how to use the potty all by herself! It's a great day when a parent doesn't have to deal with poopy diapers & all that goes with it, but imagine what it would be like if your child never hit that milestone. It wouldn't merely be gross; it would be tragic. They would forever be dependent on someone else to take care of a basic need.

Spiritually stunted babies are just as tragic. They constantly are running to someone else to clean up the mess in their life. Sure, every now & then we all need the help of others, but we all know people who are constantly having crises that they can't deal with on their own, & they need their pastors or some other spiritual leader to "fix" their mess. 

What's really tragic is that too often these spiritually stunted babies never realize what they're doing to themselves & those around them. They're either oblivious to it, or they become defiant & defensive. It's never their fault. It's always what someone else has done to them that's created the continuous drama in their lives. As a result, it becomes harder & harder to really help someone grow. Instead, family, friends, & leaders are pulled into a constant drama of hurt, blame, & unwillingness to really deal with the issues that always rear their ugly head. Until we acknowledge the reality of our immaturity, we can't grow & become stronger, more mature believers.

Spiritually Stunted Babies-Part 3

Sadly, churches are filled with spiritually stunted babies who cling to their routines & who throw fits when someone dares to challenge the statues quo. Why are these people stunted in their growth? Here's a possible answer:

We Still Can't Feed Ourselves.

It's funny to watch a little kid try to feed themselves. They get as much food on them as in them. It's cute when they're learning how to manipulate a fork or spoon to get the food to their mouth, but it's not so cute when all of this happens & a few minutes after the meal, the child is complaining because he or she is hungry. For most kids there is a stage where they should be able to feed themselves, & if they can't, something is wrong.

Spiritual babies are not that different. They either don't know how or refuse to feed themselves spiritually. Often they assume that it's someone else's job to feed them. Their Bibles become props used to decorate their homes or as an accessory each Sunday at church. In some cases, their Bible doesn't even get that much attention. Having served in ministry in one way or another for 20 years, I'm still shocked at how often I see people, especially men, come to worship or Bible study without a Bible. I mean surely you think you're going to need & use your Bible at church, right? 

As a result, they get just enough of God's Word into their lives to make a mess. They often talk about the Bible, but they don't really know Scripture or use it as the filter for their worldview. That's why it's not uncommon for spiritually stunted babies to be self-righteous hypocrites who hold people to standards of "holiness" that aren't even biblical. Each Sunday they climb into their high-chairs, known as a pew, & demand to be fed by the pastor or their small group leader. If you want a picture of a spiritually stunted baby, go check out the Pharisees in the Gospels. They embody the idea of spiritually stunted. 

Believers who can't feed themselves will not be healthy believers, & it will affect the rest of the family (church.)

Book Review: The 4 Wills Of God

I recently received a copy of "The 4 Wills Of God" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs from B&H Publishing to look over & give my review. Dr. Eggerichs is both a pastor & a conference speaker. He & his wife, Sarah, have developed the Love & Respect Conference focusing on teaching men & women how to pursue God-honoring, loving, healthy biblical relationships. Much of the insight that is shared in this book is built on the 30+ years of pastoring & counseling.

The basic premise of this book is that so often we want to know God's unique will for our lives without examining whether we're being faithful to God's universal will for us. Dr. Eggerichs rightly asserts that as we pursue faithfulness to the 4 universal wills, God's unique will become easier to discern in particular situations.

So what are the "4 Wills Of God" & where does Dr. Eggerichs find them?

1. Believe In Jesus Christ (John 6:40)
2. Give Thanks In Everything (1st Thessalonians 5:18)
3. Submit In Doing Right (1st Peter 2:13-15)
4. Abstain From Sexual Sin (1st Thessalonians 4:3)

These passages literally say something like, "This is God's will..." Therefore, there is some solid biblical foundation here that Eggerichs can build upon. He devotes a couple of chapters for each of the "4 Wills" using one chapter to lay the biblical foundation & another to flesh out practical application & tell stories to illustrate those points. For me, there were a few too many stories, but that's just me. Other readers will likely love the numerous stories that help illustrate the author's point. 

This could be a really good resource for counseling, small groups, or for individual growth as long as those using it don't reduce the "4 Wills" to some legalistic grid for morality & instead realize they are more of a road map to living the life that God desires for us of growth in Him & impact in our relationships.

Spiritually Stunted Babies-Part 2

All of us hit the pause button from time to time in our spiritual growth, but sometimes something happens and our growth gets completely stunted. It's as if we're spiritual 2 year olds, & we definitely know how to show it. Here's the second way to spot the spiritually stunted babies:

We Still Throw Fits.

Last week I talked about the fact that little kids love routine & when that routine gets messed up, the kid usually flips. That of course leads to the fit. We've all seen them. The kid momentarily loses their mind as well as control of their body. They jump up & down or roll around uncontrollably; there's usually crying or screaming involved. It's fun, big fun, but usually if the parent can wait it out, it's over relatively quickly.

The same is true of a spiritual baby. Babies, both spiritual & physical, are still primarily focused on themselves, & both spiritual & physical babies cry & throw fits when they have a need they think is going unmet. Here's the thing: not all fits are the result of purely selfish desires. A lot of times the needs are real, but the way a person goes about expressing the need is what is selfish. That's where it takes real leadership to determine whether you're dealing with a selfish person or someone who has some growing to do & is just ACTING selfish. Those are the fits you can walk with someone through & help them grow. It's when you deal with someone who seems to be a chronic fit-thrower that you need to be really concerned. That's a sign of stunted growth, & there is more going on than the particular issue they're throwing a fit about this time.

So the next time that person throws a fit because you messed with their routine, you have to figure out whether they're being selfish at the time or if they are just plain selfish. A lot of times a little kid needs you to stop & explain things further to calm them down. Then they're good. Remember that simple practice next time somebody throws a fit.

Spiritually Stunted Babies

All Christians go through seasons where we aren't growing. It may be due to our laziness or some other sin that drags us off the path of Christ, but no matter what the cause, we've all been there. Those who deny that are lying to themselves! However, I've also noticed that our churches are filled with a lot of people who don't look like it, but they are spiritual babies. They've been Christians for a long time, but somewhere along the way their growth was stunted. They may know the language & the church culture, but in reality they're reliving the same year(s) of their faith over & over again. 

Over the next few weeks I'm going to give you handful of ways you can spot the spiritually stunted babies around you or maybe that stunted baby is the person looking back in the mirror (that's how it is for me sometimes). Here's the first way that we (church people) act like spiritually stunted babies:

We Need Our Routine.

Babies like routines. Babies need routines in order to function at their best. Try messing with a two year old's routine & see what happens (we'll talk more about that tomorrow)! But here's something I've noticed: Little kids get into routines & they expect their parents to keep them up even if the child doesn't really participate. For example, when my younger daughter was little, she learned a little prayer song & insisted that we sing it at meals & at bedtime. At first, she would sing along enthusiastically, but after a little while she didn't participate at all. But guess what? If we tried to skip the song, which was getting kind of old to her mother & me, she freaks. She has to have it done that way.

In the same way, our churches have been built on routine, & there is nothing inherently wrong with that. Routine is important, but why should a routine stay in place when it is no longer useful? But that's exactly what happens in many ministries. The routine & the status quo are guarded, even at the expense of the ministry. Routine becomes a problem when it exists for its own sake. Just as a child eventually grows out of the afternoon nap routine, there will be structures & routines in your church that you will & should outgrow.

Watch out when you start messing with the routine. Those who NEED it will freak.